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Burning Bridges and Rising from the Ashes.

Updated: Sep 10, 2022

Whether or not you prefer order & symmetry as I do, you will never get there until you get rid of the chaos. Some people are okay with the chaos so they swim around in their for their whole life. That would drive me crazy! My adjustable art was born out of my affinity for symmetry, balance & order.. This is the third one I’ve done. The piece shown above is an original abstract in all it’s chaotic glory. It is a perfect way to display how before I find the balance I let out the mess. In every perfectly balanced finished product I always have an original chaotic abstract piece that I hated at first. Sometimes I am lucky enough to find a finished product in the original, unbalanced piece. Like if you look at it properly, this one pictured looks a little like a rooster. But in the end that isn’t what I went for.

The next step is to hold a piece like this up to the mirror, checking the piece from each of the four sides. If i see something that strikes a chord in me i trace the mirror image on another sheet of paper or canvas. So I am left with two separate images, perfectly symmetrical on all four sides. I can then hang it on display with any of the two matching sides together depending on which view I prefer. So the final subject matter depends on which way I hang it. For example, on the next image you will see how I took this original abstract that looks like a rooster and matched the blue edges together to start off. What I am left with from this view is the head of a panther. Just behind the panther, you might notice what looks like the eyes and nose of a tiger wearing aviators also staring down what we can only assume is the hunter. It’s almost as if the pair are daring you to test them. Almost as if to say, “Try it and see what happens.” But let me give you a little of my back story before i explain the drawing’s soul intentions. I spent the first 33 years of my life being very quiet & accommodating out of what i realize now was a great fear of being hurt. I would always subdue who I was and make my relationships with others all about them because I didn’t know how to stand up for myself or fight for my right to be exactly who I was. As a result I always seemed to attract people into my life that made me feel like it was a flaw in my character when I finally mustered up enough courage to ask for something in return… like decent behavior on their part. I also had a huge problem with looking people in the eye. I mean, people hurt me enough on the surface as it was. I was certainly not capable of protecting the soft, sweet parts of soul from their toxic behavior. Allowing them to look into my eyes was simply not an option at the time. I believe this finished piece came from a part of my soul that had finally had enough hiding. No more apologizing for who I was & no more allowing others to stuff me into their shadow. No more looking down. These jungle cats would naturally hide from a threatening hunter type, as I usually did. But if it is challenged outright, it doesn’t matter how big your gun is. It doesn’t matter if you set their home on fire. If you deliberately come into their territory and threaten them with personal harm, then there will be a fight… and you have no one to blame but yourself. Call it bravery or ignorance of the consequences. It doesn‘t matter. You may kill the panther or the tiger in the end but you will not leave the fight unharmed. And at least the jungle cat will die knowing that he lived his life exactly as he was meant regrets. I had finally found that part of my soul that was fearless, confident and knew I deserved better than what I was getting……and if i have to fight you to get it, I will.

On a completely different note, in the last view of this particular piece I have matched more green edges in the middle resulting is what appears to be either two very sad elephant heads looking towards the middle of the page underneath the branches of a tree, or two parrot heads looking sadly at the rest of the forest surrounding the outside edge of the pages which are on fire. While at the bottom of the page the blue part represents water as if someone is attempting to put out the forest fire and save the animals. I think the undertones of this view of the drawing center more around how discouraged I feel that about having to result to negativity, violence and destruction in some manner of speaking just to keep what should rightfull be yours to keep to begin with. Jungle animals aren’t picking a fight….. ever. Similary I also do not. They just want to live in peace in a place they belong & feel safe in. Then the rest of the world comes in with their guns, fire, anger and their poor choices and tries to make you believe you are not completely entitled to the place where you know you belong. Yes, the animals will fight for what is theirs,,.as will I. But at what cost? Even if we win, why did this have to be the way? Securing your peace at the expense of someone else’s isnt exactly ideal, is it? Maybe that just has to be the way. Maybe we must burn the old toxic way down & let the new waters flood in and nourish new growth that we might all thrive in. And let us not forget that the old way was not for nothing. For it is part of what made us who we are today.

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